my life is weird. i have crazy dreams.


last night i dreamt that i was suddently going out with ed now ed is this guy i know i dunno how old he is but he has 4 kids. preteen and teenagers. so its weird that i had a dream with him in it and then he said we were engaged and i was alll hoollddd up there buddy. just a weird weird thing.


uhh i'm working on a blanket crocheted squares and yesterday i layed them all out in the order they will be sewn together i need some more so i'll make those today and hopefully get them done and then start sewing the blanket together it should be cool i'm excited.

i've realized that there is a lack of skirts in stores so i just have to make them myself i guess. but i still haven't checked out jc penny yet maybe someday and i can't even find short sleeve t-shirts like seriously? thats so weird to me.

also another weird thing suddenly i can drink real milk again its so weird cause it used to give me problems but not anymore apparently.

ugh i keep sneezing and my eye has beeen twitching for like 3 weeks. annnnoying. k i'm gonna go do laundry and work on squares and maybe read a little bit.

i just don't know. i don't know what i wanted to write about last week i dunno what i'm thinking or feeling right now i'm just kind of jumbled.

oh last week was the street fair that was fun i went out and hung out with people (something rare for me these days) um but it was good.

right now i dunno if its cause i'm tired or other reasons i will not mention. but today was okay i hate trying to find clothes though i mean i don't have a lot and i'd like to find stuff for cheap i went to some garage sales today after i helped janni with check in at childrens ministry second service. didn't find anything. i chilled at home for awhile then went to torn. it was okay i dunno like during service i was just kinda blah and after they did this prayer thing and it was super amazing to watch but me i was just sitting there and i felt alone in a sea of people kind of thing i dunno if i'm just crazy or what. but its how i feel and i came home and was sad could be hormones but i dunno. i just don't effing know. i mean people are all don't be a stranger hang out with us blahblahblah but do they really feel like that or do they just say it? and why do i feel like an outsider why am i so socially awkward i just don't know


I DON'T KNOWWWWW!!!!! i'm frustrated and i'm sad and i wish specific people were around for me and they aren't and that kills me.

in other news i really like cake and i shouldn't eat it but i couldn't help myself. thats all for now i guess.

well I'm new to this blog hop thing so hello people! i hope i can read more blogs and have some blog friends soon. but anyways this is my favorite picture right now. i took it few weeks ago at a park/beach called Lincoln park, there was a low tide the lowest of the year so i headed out and took some pictures this is a sea anemone my favorite by far.

well 4th of july was sucko well not all of it but a fair amount of it did suck. the details aren't really all that important though.

heat rash sucks really bad.

i did manage to make it through church yesterday though. but i was barely functioning my stomach was hurting all night and most of the day so i got little sleep. but yeah

now onto another post i'm really lovin the blog thing right now if only more people read or i had more blog friends.

life is crazy but i'm slowly learning to love that craziness. lots of stuff has gone one and some i'm not sure about and some i'm just indifferent about.

it makes me sad that i am not talking to some people but i dunno i guess thats how it is.

so weird like my ex best friend messaged me on facebook i dunno thats just weird to me. and its not like i hate her cause i don't we had really amazing times but we just weren't the best friends we could have or should have been. i mean we weren't close everyone thought we were but really we weren't. only one person could see that and i'm still friends with him luckily we had rough patches but we're cool and i'm very blessed because of it. i'm blessed by firends that live far. better than nothing right? but anyway back to erica i dunno its just so weird its hilarious too cause like she told evan "when amy and i broke up..." that part just made me laugh cause it sounds so funny. but yeah i mean it was just time for our friendship to end simple as that. and honestly it kind of scares me to think what if that never happened i wouldn't be the person i am now. and thats just weird to think about.

i really love my friends like i said evan and i have kinda reconnected i mean we had talked off and on but now its like more regular and today he asked if i wanted to fly out and then drive back home with him. hes been in arkansas for a few years and is now getting a divorce and moving back home. so i dunno its something to think about. sounds super fun though i just need to get my ducks in a row before i can find that out. but yeah people are fun and amazing and i feel much happier now.

i need to work on paralell parking super bad. things seem to have calmed down around here which i'm super grateful for.

but church man last week was nuts i dunno what it is but theres a super lackage of volunteers and of the ones we have not showing up at all. so annoying and stressfull. last week i did childrens ministry two services stayed for a bbq after church and then went to a meeting and then i was trying to stay so i could actually go to service but i was falling asleep so i went home. crazy crazy

tuesday i came down with a cold didn't sleep well that night not much at all really. but then last night i slept for 11 hours i feel a bunch better actually so thats cool.

i dunno if i had more to say. OH i might be doing this blogger book review thing its super exciting to me. uhh i need to work outa nd shed these pounds

i dunno what else really. i'm just excited for september and things to come for once i'm not sad about it and that gives me hope. so thats all i got for now.