a big bunch of crazy!

So I am totally insane. I haven't written in awhile cause I didn't know what to write. But here we go and brace yourself for some of insanity.

Anxiety:

I have it. And i'm seriously going insane. So i'm freaking out a bout a lot of things lately. One is the boys job. Its supposed to be transitioned to a no contract/permanent position. But you have to submit your resume/interview for it. And the fact that you have to do that too the slight possibility that he could get bypassed for it is like freaking me out. He works with these people every day but ugh its driving me crazy.

Next bit of anxiety, teeth. First it was my retainer that was breaking. I got that taken care of. But now I noticed spots on my teeth and I have gone through this whole huge thing of me freaking out and crying about the fact that I could have cavities. Cause honestly I don't have money to do any of this. And cavities I sure don't have money for and it just terrifies me.

I was watching an episode of keeping up with kardashians today and lamar has like tons of cavities. I seriously was cringing and getting all freaked out and full of anxiety at the thought of the dentist. I'm so SO crazy. I got the nervousness and the wanting to throw up and everything. So I was freakin gout so bad about my teeth this week that I made an appointment to get my teeth cleaned. And then I had more anxiety. I did switch toothpastes so I looked again today and some of my spots are lighter. But sheesh. I dunno what I do with myself.

I'm sure there is more anxiety I have but who knows what that is right now. Its best I don't think about it. Haha.

So my best friend colin is getting married. SO weird but so awesome. Hes 40 so its kind of about time. I approve of his lady even if I haven't met her. I generally have feelings about people and hes had some really bad ladies before. So i'm happy hes happy. But that means I have to drive down to oregon to see it. Which i'm happy to do but it'd be better if I was the one that didn't have to do all the driving. But it is what it is. I was toying with the idea of renting a car because i'm not sure my car is ready for that. Its 253,000 miles but it is a honda and the majority of miles on my car were freeway miles. But I dunno. Hopefully I can use my moms car.

Another thing we're doing is going on a low carb diet. Honestly I have an addiction to pretzels/chips/cereals. And i'm fat so we are starting this new way of eating. Its kind of like paleo but not really. I dunno i'm just trying to not think about the things I can't have. But so far its going good. We aren't totally all in it yet. But its alright. The weird thing is you eat things that the full fat. Like whole milk, full fat cottage cheese. I've never had that stuff before until recently. But I like it! Hopefully that will help me with my weight and also for my hair. I'm so discouraged sometimes about how thin it is. I know its hard to wait for it to grow. I'm not sure if my iron is the right level but i'm hoping it is. Anyways.

This past weekend we had my cousins boys and we haven't seen them in months and months its so sad. But it was SO fun to have them. They are hilarious especially the youngest one. It makes me sad that we don't see them but maybe that will change soon. I wish he would still snuggle though. I miss that.

My foot is still kinda weird but not all the time. And I can wear flip flops if they have support so thats good I just ordered some.

Last thing is I LOVE trader joes. With this whole new food thing we went to trader joes and found meats that have no nitrates or nitrites. Man that tastes SO amazing. But I also got new shampoo there with no harsh chemicals. I decided to go try it because I have super itchy skin and a really dry itchy scalp that sometimes burns. And honestly I was tired of it so I wanted to try it out. Well it totally went away and my dry flaky skin has gone away too. Its amazing. So I love trader joes.

Thats about all I have for now. Comment friends. And hi new followers!